|
||||||||||||||||||||
|
||||||||||||||||||||
|
CLEOPATRA: The Last Pharaoh Of Egypt Was One Cunning Bitch! Born into an age of uncertainty for Egypt, Cleopatra used her brains and wiles to keep her country an independent kingdom. She was the first Pharaoh in generations to actually speak Egyptian, not to mention eight other languages. History tells us that she was shrewd and calculating, and a master of political games. Cleopatra was still a mere teenager when her father died and she took the throne in partner with her younger brother, Ptolemy XIII. Even though family law dictated they be wed to keep the Dynasty pure, the little traitor had her ousted and took control of the Kingdom. But on the horizon, Rome had its eyes on the lush prizes of the Nile and Julius Caesar soon came for a historic visit. Our girl Cleo was a smart bitch and knew baby brother would have her axed as soon as word got out that she was back in town. She also knew that a man like Caesar could protect her and return her to power. The clever girl had herself wrapped in an oriental rug and taken to Caesar's rooms. When they unrolled the rug in front of the 54-year-old man, a nubile 22-year-old woman came tumbling out; ready to do whatever it took to get her throne back. Soon, Ptolemy XIII's armies were defeated, the river swallowed him and our queen was back in business. She had to marry her youngest brother, Ptolemy XIV to keep with the incestuous laws of the time but she used her wiles well and scheduled a little trip with her new protector to seal the union between Rome and Egypt. After two months of love on the river Nile, Caesar went back to Rome and she went home to gestate. Six months later she bore Caesar a son. This won our darling a trip to Rome where the proud papa housed her in style and fawned over her. This did not sit well with the Romans and soon rumors began to fly about her bitchiness. Instead of being adult about the whole thing and talking to Cleo herself, they killed her sugar daddy, forcing our girl to take her brother/husband and son home quickly. On the way Ptolemy XIV died suddenly and she took her son as her co regent, cleverly maintaining all the power of the throne. Not one to wax sentimental over dead lovers, Cleopatra watched the turmoil in Rome from afar waiting to see who would come out on top. Egypt was still no match for a hostile Rome and she was determined to align herself with whoever would protect her. Soon it became apparent that the crude, vulgar Mark Antony was the man to impress, so she set out in a glided barge for his camp. When she landed, it was soon apparent he was no match for her and was soon wrapped tightly around her little finger. Rome was not happy to have yet another one of their heroes succumb to the wiles of the smart bitch from a foreign land and proceeded to call her names and talk trash about her sexual appetite and habits. It also didn't help that Mark Antony had a wife back home with some heavy political ties. Soon there was a battle with heavy losses. Mark and Cleo retreated as planned, but none of their ships were able to follow. Soon the Egyptians were defeated and Rome had a firm grip on Alexandria. She tried aligning herself with Octavian, but he made it clear that he was not interested in any type of alliance. Cleo knew her days were finally numbered. With Mark Antony dead by his own hand and her armies laid to waste, she felt there was only one thing she could do. This bitch wasn't going to be paraded in the streets of Rome as a slave. When Octavian's men found her, she was laid out on her bed, dressed in royal finery. The legends say she had an Asp smuggled in a basket of figs and killed herself with the snake's poisonous bite. In the Egyptian culture of the time, that was a sure way to immortality. It must have worked. Cleopatra's smart and seductive brand of bitch has been immortalized in words and works of art for centuries. The last Pharaoh of Egypt is the most famous and with good reason. A quick-witted, charismatic woman devoted to her country, she calculated the risks until the very end. BunnyBitch  |
|
||||||||||||||||||
|
[back to top] [privacy policy 'n AUP's] |
© 2004 - 2005 BFP MEDIA PRODUCTIONS - All Rights Reserved.
Friday, May 16, 2008 07:11:58 PM HST |
|||||||||||||||||||
